I love to stay at home. I loved it a lot more when I had a choice though. This pandemic has changed so much for so many. Income loss, worsened depression and anxiety, longing to be touched again, missing our friends and family; all of this combined with the paralyzing fear that we might get… Continue reading The big picture.
I remember the day he walked out of my house and slammed the door. I sat on my kitchen floor, sobbing hysterically and begging, screaming for him to come back. He was the one who broke the trust. He was the one who never respected my boundaries or put to rest my insecurities. And yet,… Continue reading A grateful heart.
“You don’t choose bad people. You choose people. How they decide to treat you is their responsibility, not yours.” Wise words from my therapist last week. I’ve been dwelling on these words and hoping to find some truth in there. Hoping to believe it. When I moved away to a different state at 19, I was… Continue reading False portrayals.
My Marine called me today. It’s 2 am where he is stationed. It’s noon here and I’m at work. I can tell he’s had a few drinks but he’s back in the barracks and going to bed so I can breathe a little easier. As we were about to hang up, we were both talking at… Continue reading Love you mom.
The other day I told someone that he’s not happy because he’s constantly reaching, chasing and searching for more. He’s missing out on so much joy because he’s not living in the moment. Then it hit me that I am also guilty. Seems that many of us are just never happy with what we have. We… Continue reading Burned bridges, bucket lists and bare feet.
I read an article today about country music star Granger Smith’s final moments with his 3-year-old son. He shared (in a youtube video) that one moment he was playing with his daughter while his two younger sons played with water guns. As he watched his daughter doing gymnastics he thought to himself, “soak up this… Continue reading Soak up these moments.
Most people know about my obsession with John Mayer. He has a song for every mood of mine, every heartbreak and every reason to smile. I'm sitting with my laptop, swaying back and forth to "Your Body is a Wonderland" and I daydream about someone feeling that way about me. "You look so good it… Continue reading Moving on and getting over.
I often stare at my boys and their perfect faces, whether in person or in photo albums, in absolute wonderment. I can’t believe they are mine and that God blessed me with the ultimate gift. I love them so much, sometimes I cry over it. There are hardly words to describe a mother’s love. It’s overwhelming.… Continue reading My village.
You were the Queen of hidden gems. The Princess of the light. You could find the silver lining in any situation. You often found the humor too, even in the biggest disasters. In the face of an incurable, horrible disease, you smiled. You even made jokes about the people you would like to come back… Continue reading Until we meet again, sweet angel.
I need to drop some dead weight. Lately I feel like I am being weighed down by too many things that don’t serve me well. I think I’ve made too many lifestyle changes in the past few weeks and it has all caught up to me. I switched my birth control method which has left… Continue reading Under construction.